my affair with my sis in law

[seowlang]

It was nearing year end and this is the time of the year that my work load is heaviest and pressure is up to the neck. I was spending little time with J. I knew she wanted to see more of me, but i couldnt give her the time. There were also some business trips here and there. One of the trip was 10 days in USA due to some unexpected delay. Due to the time difference, i dont have time to talk or msn J. I called her before I left JFK airport and told her I was waiting for my flight to come home. I was arriving Spore on a Friday morning..

J: So u like finally called me!!! I missed u.
I: I really missed u too.
J: u are arriving tmr early morning?
I: yup.
J: ok, i will apply urgent leave. I'll pick u up at the airport.
I: hmm.. your sister is already picking me up.
*silence*
J: oh ok. in that case, should we meet tmr night?
I: Dear, I cant as well. your sis and I are driving up to KL with some friends on Friday night. Sorry I forgot to tell you earlier as I was over loaded with many meetings. we are only back on Sunday night.

There was a very long silence. I knew J was extremely disappointed.

I: im sorry dear. can we meet next week?
J: ok.. have a safe trip back.
I: im really sorry.. lets meet monday night?
J: we will arrange again. bye.
I: ok bye.

Initially when we couldnt meet often due to work, she would always greet me with a tight hug when we finally met. We would spend hours talking over dinner or drinks, catching up on lost times. But as times go by, J's work load began heavier and heavier. I was beginning to see lesser of her especially after my trip to the USA. I didnt think much about it but accepted her reasoning that she wanted to prove herself since its the first job and her company is willing to groom her. There were several occasions where I was free in the evening and suggested picking J up after her work but she couldnt even leave the office at 9 or 10pm. I was worried but she assured me that she could take it. In a way, I thought J was like me, driven and motivated in work.

It went on for another month of very little meeting and by then I was beginning to feel something was amiss. And it was that faithful weekend that confirmed it. It was a Friday night and we didnt meet because J said she had work to do in the office. My wife was finally working on that Saturday and I immediately called J up early in the morning to ask her out. For the first time in our relationship, J was not able to meet me on a weekend when I was able to. She said she was sick.

I: Are you ok?
J: no, im not well. lets not meet today.
I: can i come over to your place?
J: my mum is home. its not convenient.
I: tell u what. I go pick you up and u can rest at my place. I can cook porridge for u.
J: no lah. I really dont want to go out. let me stay at home ok?

I reluctantly said yes and hung up. I was appalled, frustrated and angry. Why didnt she want to meet me? I drove to her house wanting to confront her. When i was at her door, I sms her that im outside and that she come out because I really wanted to talk to her face to face. I was in a confrontational mood, but I restained myself and spoke to her nicely when she came out.

I: Dear, is something wrong? I can tell that u do not want to see me. did i upset you in anyway?
J: no. you are thinking too much. im just sick and want to rest.
I: i know u are sick but... im surprise u dont even want to come my place to rest.

J kept quiet and kept looking at her feet. I knew she was hiding something. I decided not to beat about the bush and asked her.

I: tell me.. are u seeing someone?
J: no im not.
I: i will not be offended. I just want the truth bcos its just not u to turn me away like that. Pls tell me ok?

J was still looking at her feet and my hand tipped her chin up to face me. There were tears in her eyes.

I: Darling! whats wrong? u are scaring me. Pls.. tell me!
J: im just feeling emo. Im fine... I... I... *long pause for probably 30 sec* I just need some time alone.
I: Ok. u are not happy with me is it?
J: nope its not that. anyway, i'll be fine.
I: ok. u go and rest first if u dont feel like talking. lets meet tomorrow or monday?
J: ok

I left her place with a heavy heart. Something was very wrong and she seemed to be hiding it from me. I was feeling very depressed and worried. Fuck my life..

[rob_onny]

Bro Seowlang, pls don't tell me J has ur child leow...

Originally Posted by seowlang

......
I left her place with a heavy heart. Something was very wrong and she seemed to be hiding it from me. I was feeling very depressed and worried. Fuck my life..

[gottosam]

I doubt it 'cos if J is pregnant...TS's family would know about it sooner or later (his wife still dunno about this affair) unless it was ab..... which I very much doubted it.
I think J was trying hard to get over TS but could not...and the sense of guilt was eating into her...juz my guess
Dear TS, I've been following your story silently since the start...thanks for sharing this critical part of your life with us...what u went through...sense of guilt towards wife and worry for J...I can never imagine...hope u can get over it one day...everyone makes mistake n deserves a 2nd chance in life...my 2 cts worth. Waiting for your next update!

[Devil Reds]

Bro TS...took me nearly 1 hr plus to finish reading your story.
Errr...do you want to consider a script writing job at MediaCorp?!?!
The story line damn tak gong lor.....looking forward to the finale!!!!

[MarsIswar]

[QUOTE=seowlang;I left her place with a heavy heart. Something was very wrong and she seemed to be hiding it from me. I was feeling very depressed and worried. Fuck my life..[/QUOTE]

The epic of life have came in at this part of the story While reading the last update the pain the helpless and lost was felt , It remind me of the past that I once have  ....
I guess it was painful when you type this part of the story... Just like how everytime when I try typing out my own story halfway I will feel the cut was so fresh seem like yesterday .... Kudos to your bravery of typing out the whole part .. You inspired me to be brave and cont with my story... Prost
And thank dude...

[seowlang]

On that very saturday night, I received an sms from J. it read..
J: I have sent u an email. pls read it. If u respect me, pls do not call or sms me back. I will call u when im ready. gd nite.


Bros (and a small number of sisters), I had thought for a while how i should relate what J wrote to me. in the end, think its best i give the email as it is. I have copy and paste the email below. except for the undersigned name, nothing was changed.
there was an attachment with the email, its our song. if u want to know exactly how i felt that night, u may want to click on this link before reading below.



++++++++++++++++++++


Dear,

It took me a very long time to decide to write this to you. I know I can never say this to you face to face. Im sorry dear. As I am writing this, I am listening to our song, 愛, 很簡單.
It has been 7 months since we are together. I love you deeply and I believe you know it. You are the best thing that happened to me. I have never felt so at ease with another man, never been so immense in laughter and happiness. There was never a dull moment with you.. even when you are sleeping I just love to lie next to you and look at you. Your smell, your breath, your everything. During these few months, I have experienced the happiest moment of my life... and pain as well.

You want to know why I always keep looking at you and not speak a word? Cause ever since we started, I knew it will end some day. I want to have a good look at you, because I don’t know when will be the day that I can never see you up close again, cheek to cheek, eye to eye, like all couples do. I want to be able to see your face as and when I want to do it in my mind. The way when you are laughing, telling me jokes or making fun of me, when you are happy, even when you are sad or stressed up with work, or even when you have your eyes closed and asleep. I want to remember everything about you that I have visuals of. I’d never want to forget you.

Thank you so much for all these times while we are together. You have showered me with love, care and concern, time, devotion and lots of gifts and surprises. I know it is not easy for you during these months too. At times I tried to put myself in your shoes, and try feeling the difficult position you are in. It must have been very hard to lie to my sis ever so often, to find time and energy to meet me. I know you are extremely stressed out at work and even though you are drained out after a long day’s work, you found time for me. I am really sorry for putting you through this… I really do.

Dear, I am also sorry that I have lied to you many times… Lying that I am happy the way it is now. Lying that its fine for my bf to be heading home everyday but its never to me. Lying that not having you around on weekends cause you have to keep my sis company is fine. Lying to my friends that my boyfriend is always busy and unable to attend dinners, drinks etc. together with them. Lying that I am very busy with work that I can’t meet up with you. Lying that everything is ok.

You asked if I have changed… Yes I think I have. I have changed my perspectives of life. I know we can never be together eventually and I may never find another man like you in my life. Thus, I choose to work and only in work can I get myself emotionally and mentally detached from our problems.

It is painful, very painful to me that I am not able to see the future of us being together. I do not know how you see it because both of us often refuse to accept reality. And the reality is, you are married to my sis and I can never, ever be with you. Dear… I think these few months are already long enough for us to be in this way. It is a chapter of my life that I will never ever forget. Please.. Let us remain as what we are.. you as my brother in law and I as your sis in law.

We may not have a chance to be together this live but if people do get reincarnated, I want to marry you and be with you in all our future lives… for better or for worse… I love you.

Yours,

+++++++++++++++++++++


I didnt cry after reading the letter. I wept.

[seronok]

Bro this is such a sad part of the story. I didn't know that I can tear while reading something in this forum. If it makes me tear, I can imagine how hurt or sorrowful you felt at that time. Time heals all wounds so hope you are better now.

[seowlang]

Originally Posted by seronok

Bro this is such a sad part of the story. I didn't know that I can tear while reading something in this forum. If it makes me tear, I can imagine how hurt or sorrowful you felt at that time. Time heals all wounds so hope you are better now.

Bro,
till this very day, more than a year later, i still get very very emotional when i read it. guess i need a whisky now..

im continue again soon..

[ice meltg]

Originally Posted by seronok

Bro this is such a sad part of the story. I didn't know that I can tear while reading something in this forum. If it makes me tear, I can imagine how hurt or sorrowful you felt at that time. Time heals all wounds so hope you are better now.

Me too, Very sad though expected to happen, Bro Seowlang must be very much affected, hope time can really dampen the damage significantly, do moved on & take good care !!

Bro, 放下吧 ！只能把一切存孚于心，发挥牺牲自我， 完成他人， 容忍一切，俾求对方幸福，温馨，那才是爱的本色

Look at it positively, it could hv done more damage if yr relationship is exposed, then its not only gg to affect both of u but all those ppl close to all of u, in fact; it may even changed the entire life of those ard u, life may nvr be the same again !!!

Just my humble opinion !!! Pl take good care !!!

[MarsIswar]

Originally Posted by seowlang

Bro,
till this very day, more than a year later, i still get very very emotional when i read it. guess i need a whisky now..

im continue again soon..

Bro the feeling I have after reading this will be都是天涯沦落人 if given to me now I will pick a 151 rather than a whisky... Allow me to offer a toast of respect to you kudos....
Bro Await for the next installment....

[raul1333]

Bro,
I have been following your story silently.
After all the twist and turn in the story you hit the wall.
It must have been real tough to put up a front to your wife when you are so sad inside.

[latishame]

This is one of the best story ever ! So much emotions involved

[conman]

TS, I really don't know what to say when I saw the line on recarnation cos I heard it before but it's thru the mouth. I know how sore and painful it is. Hope u have gone past it and moved on. Cheers!

[bugmenot]

Bro seowlang, I can understand the entire emotional roller coaster ride u had been through, especially when the song "爱很简单" clearly spells it all.. I had my fair share of such happiness mixed misery 5yrs back when I was singing "爱一个人好难" in a pub.. It was also due to a relationship that was not meant to be as well..

May the strength be with you bro!

[sennheiser]

i feel your pain bro.