Jokes for Relaxing.. [new thread]

[Hurricane88]

More covid-19 jokes...

[Hurricane88]

This is the funniest one I’ve seen so far.... 😂🤣....

EMPLOYEE NOTICE

Due to the current financial situation caused by the Corona Virus and slowdown in the economy, the Government has decided to implement a scheme to put workers of 50 years of age and above on early, mandatory retirement, thus creating jobs and reducing unemployment.

This scheme will be known as RAPE (Retire Aged People Early).

Persons selected to be RAPED can apply to the Government to be considered for the SHAFT program (Special Help After Forced Termination).

Persons who have been RAPED and SHAFTED will be reviewed under the SCREW program (System Covering Retired-Early Workers).

A person may be RAPED once, SHAFTED twice and SCREWED as many times as the Government deems appropriate.

Persons who have been RAPED could get AIDS (Additional Income for Dependents & Spouse) or HERPES (Half Earnings for Retired Personnel Early Severance).

Obviously persons who have AIDS or HERPES will not be SHAFTED or SCREWED any further by the Government.

Persons who are not RAPED and are staying on will receive as much SHIT (Special High Intensity Training) as possible. The Government has always prided themselves on the amount of SHIT they give our citizens.

Should you feel that you do not receive enough SHIT, please bring this to the attention of your TD, who has been trained to give you all the SHIT you can handle.

Sincerely,
The Committee for Economic Value of Individual Lives (E.V.I.L.)

PS - Due to Corona Virus, recent budget cuts and the rising cost of electricity, gas and oil, as well as current market conditions, The Light at the End of the Tunnel has been turned off.

[KTVbuddy]

Originally Posted by Hurricane88

i like this type of working from home.

[amyouanh]

Originally Posted by Hurricane88

This is the funniest one I’ve seen so far.... 😂🤣....

EMPLOYEE NOTICE

Due to the current financial situation caused by the Corona Virus and slowdown in the economy, the Government has decided to implement a scheme to put workers of 50 years of age and above on early, mandatory retirement, thus creating jobs and reducing unemployment.

…………...

Hahahahaha LMAO

[DuaLipa]

Really laugh with all the jokes here.

Thanks to bro bigbigbird, hurricane88 and others for sharing.

[bigbentower]

Originally Posted by Hurricane88

This is the funniest one I’ve seen so far.... 😂🤣....


Sincerely,
The Committee for Economic Value of Individual Lives (E.V.I.L.)

PS - Due to Corona Virus, recent budget cuts and the rising cost of electricity, gas and oil, as well as current market conditions, The Light at the End of the Tunnel has been turned off.

Good joke and laugh like hell.

Cheers bro.

[diputs1269]

Originally Posted by Hurricane88

More covid-19 jokes...

Love this because is on home ground, cheers!

[xesuzuki]

Originally Posted by KTVbuddy

i like this type of working from home.

Yeah, having fun while working too

[cokexia]

Originally Posted by Hurricane88

Good to relax the mind

[DeborahNguyen]

Originally Posted by bigbirdbird

Later that evening, the doctor came home, read the postcard, fell to the floor with a heart attack. Paramedics rushed him to the ER. The lead medic stayed back to comfort the wife.

He asked what trauma had precipitated the cardiac arrest.

So, the wife picked up the card and read, “‘Spaghetti, Spaghetti, Spaghetti, Spaghetti. Two with sausage and meatballs, two without’.”

Freaking good share, ROFL hehehe

[oldsheldon]

Originally Posted by diputs1269

Love this because is on home ground, cheers!

Home ground advantage!!

[bigbirdbird]

[bigbirdbird]

[LackHeritage]

Originally Posted by bigbirdbird

Damn lucky man!! Nice share bro

[FujiApple]

Originally Posted by bigbirdbird

Thanks for sharing