Sexless Marriage

[Camel]

Just read this article, thought it would be nice to have opinions.

The article is about a sexless marriage where (usually the woman) refuses to
have sex with the husband for small trivial reason or give silly excuses
like "tired" or etc. According to these people this constitutes as an abusive
relationship, the abuser being the one that denies the sex.

Had many friends had to have to go "eat outside" because their wifes' refuse
sex because of stupid reasons, like tired, no mood or some other reason.

Do you think these women are actually abusing their spouses and in turn
destroying their marriage?

Article: http://pb3131.hubpages.com/hub/A-Sex...e-Relationship

[n30n]

I agree on this article, if the women involved are using sex in the power struggle within the relationship.

But this article don't apply for women who are not playing the power game.
If becoming sexless is an issue, both of them should be putting in effort to work things out. Not for the man to blame woman for abuse.

It doesn't matter who's the one destroying the marriage. The blame games takes you no where. As long as the marriage fails, both partners are held responsible for the failure. Shirking responsibility and putting the full blame on others just reveal something bad about yourself.

As for the solution part of the article, it's also rather biase to say counsellors only focus on the women side of the story. In actual fact, most counsellors will guide to mediate the unsatisfied needs to both partners. So it's not one sided at all.
If the root cause of the low libido is understood and solved, sex life should be able to become better.

[skybandit]

Then what is the purpose for getting married in the first place ?

[chenzong]

Originally Posted by skybandit

Then what is the purpose for getting married in the first place ?

To give children legitimacy? Or, in the context of Singapore, to get an HDB flat?

[BigBoy2]

Originally Posted by chenzong

To give children legitimacy? Or, in the context of Singapore, to get an HDB flat?

Well that is a good reply Bro..... I think all marriages are committed in the heat of the moment. Being too rational will kill it all. That is why today there are many singles out there, we the more an individual sees in this society the more they starts to weigh thing.

So that is why there are so many out there look for FB, etc...... It use only to have hookers, but now there are also Male escorts......

Sometimes marriage is not to satisfy the individual but to make the parents happy.

Just my 2 cents worth........

[drifand]

this is just almost the same as girls who dont even give oral sex or what not.

I would put my 2 cents into testing your girl of your dreams first before you go down the marriage path.

Door swings both ways as well, I probably think that there are horny girls who want sex but the husband is plain not interested and reason why she married him was he is rich.

Just to play fair on both side of the gender here, I think if one needs sex in life has to ensure his/her lifetime partner is up for it regardless how handsome/pretty they are.

No point I have miss universe in my hand and I cant fuck. Is a simple for show only, what the hell for?

If you were into marriage because you want hdb then you got what you deserve, you shouldnt be complaining.

If your parents force you, then is basically up to you to say no.

There are people who marry because of love and not for sex, if thats the case they wouldnt be complaining either.

The ones who complain are the ones who do not have a clue what the fuck they are doing and are just blindly in love and say yes to him/her at that moment.

Always test, you could even be not happy with a girl too horny. You never know but make sure you are happy before you go ahead.

[joncheong]

Personally i think it is very important to test out your partner before marriage.... She can be a wonderful wife-material or good mother but if you are the kind of guy who needs sex and wake up with wife cuddling you, better think twice before marrying... No point signing on the paper at the spur of the moment....

So moral of story ... Test product first before buying... Good for both parties... Save first time for wedding night... Is utter nonsense....

[slutwen]

I have a woman colleague who had been married for more than 10 years. Recently, we went deep into our conversation about sex. I realize her husband does not have regular sex with her. On their honeymoon, they did not have sex until they return back. During her first 2 years of marriage, she found out he was having affair outside and threaten to divorce him but family members on both sides pleaded both to remain calm. Life when on with occasional sex till they have 2 kids. Since then, they remain sexless for the rest of the years.

What I want to say, it may not be the woman's fault but the man has a role to play to initiate sex. This colleague of mine is in her early 40s and still attractive. It is an unfortunate for her to remain sexless.tied to get her out but she always says to remain faithful to her husband. On the other hand, her relationship with her husband is kind of drawing further away and nothing to talk except on household issues.

This is what I call sexual abuse.